Single Christian women need not despair. Oh, they think so too but do they act it? They mouth it all right and tell you ‘it is well’ as often as possible. Problem is, do they believe it, do we believe them?
The single state has been designed by society to be a deplorable state, fit only for the miserable. Why a young woman should accept that verdict beats me? You can only be single once and once you are married, you are in it for life. So what’s the rush? Girls on the fast lane know how to cope, cut corners and enjoy themselves while waiting for the right man to show up.
Why should a Christian single woman differ? Not that I’d advocate anything sinful, I’m a Christian you know, much as you find that difficult to believe. But I can’t lie about issues or pretend about anything. The spade has no other name, abi? Now, too many single Christian sisters wear long faces. It is usually too obvious that they are unhappy, perplexed about their unmarried state.
They act out of context sometimes and it is so easy to read in them their unsettled minds. Of course, if you do as much as broach the subject or suggest that they are worried about their single state, they vehemently deny it, quoting Bible verses for you.
“It is well.” “God is in control”. “Jesus Christ is my husband”. Fine, good positive confession.
A Christian should not say negative things because the Bible says God’s thoughts towards us are good thoughts. But where only lip-service is paid to the holy book, something is wrong. Single Christian women can keep their faith, integrity and still be happy.
Wearing your heart on your sleeve exposes you to temptation. Remember, the devil will use your weakness to tempt you. If you go about looking like the world’s is about to cave in, that is inviting trouble.
And don’t you go thinking that because your hair is unpermed and you plait it with thread, the ‘worldly guys’ aren’t going to bother you. Those guys are interested in good things sometimes just for the fun of ‘conquering a holy Mary’ and at other times because they’ve bedded and conquered too many ‘worldly girls they’d rather marry a good girl.
Where that leaves you is in a dangerous position. Your cool natural looks are attractive enough for all men. I once met a young bachelor who said that he’s only attracted to girls who weave their hair and don’t wear make-up.
He said he has no intention of marrying any girl who is not a born-again Christian. Here’s a guy who drinks and smokes (not heavily, though) and believes marriage does not stop a few flings now and then. For him, he’s not a church and prayer person and so needs a woman who can ‘talk to God and take the kids to church on my behalf.’ This kind of man won’t do any Christian single girl much good, not spiritually at least.
He may allow you to continue going to church. That is important to him, you know. He’d probably follow you once in a while or even regularly if you insist. As for his smoking and drinking habits, he’d assure you he’d give them up over time.
He’d pray with you, read the Bible and do all to convince you he’s ready to follow you to God. It is only on sex that you are bound to differ on. He’d tell you that the Bible allows sex before marriage as long as the man does the honourable thing eventually.
So if he’s marrying you next year, why can’t you have sex this year?. He’d tell you as long as you are faithful to each other, pray about things it’s all right. If you’ve decided to marry him at all cost because you are getting too old and ‘smelling stale’, I guess you’d reason with him.
God help you if you marry him. He’d defile you first. Marriage is one serious business. It’s hard enough coping with a Christian husband but an unbeliever or a half-believer is real tough luck. When a Christian can’t wait on the Lord beyond mouthing it, she’d eventually run into trouble.
An impatient or desperate Christian girl will bend God’s law, try to rationalise what the Bible says about fornication, unequal yoke with an unbeliever and other forms of immorality. I suppose it’s not easy to patiently wait on the Lord where everybody is pressuring you to marry.
Tendency is for you to jump on the next ‘bus.’ Such buses are usually headed for doom. Take care that you don’t lose sight of your salvation because while you are waiting, all sorts of men would come your way. In fact, they will come so fast, so soon, in droves that you’d be confused if you don’t know who you believe.
It’s quite easy to choose by the flesh and dream of the man you want, not the one God chose for you. It’s easy to choose by your eyes, not the spirit. If you fail to see that your salvation is complete and a suitor is only an added advantage, not the main thing, you may lose it all – your salvation, peace of mind, heaven and even that marriage you are so desperate about. Watch it sisters.
The wolves are on the prowl. Don’t marry an unbeliever if you care for your belief and heaven. Let
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